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too much information

November 9, 2006

I remember reading that Jesus didn't tell his disciples everything because they couldn't handle it. In fact, he said he had much to share that they couldn't handle just then. How much of this truth he ever told them, I don't know, but it's worth noting, that whatever it was, it WASN'T all given at once.

Truth isn't simply telling all, EVEN when someone request it all. Rather, truth should be unfolding as its gradually unpacked. In my efforts to be real and in my efforts to to build deep connections, I've mistakenly dumped far too much "truth" to the hurt of me and the one I tried to connect with.

Its been a belief of mine that the why's and context of an action helps to put the act, especially one that surfacely seems wrong, into a sympathetic context. Not that the wrong is less wrong but seeing the stressors that contributed to the act, may awaken compassion from your own experience and judgement wouldn't be without understanding. This seems ok, but like most things, rarely does it work out according to plan.

The past is as unchanging as a rung bell. Once its rung, its rung. Chose your analogy, scrambled egg, shot arrow/bullet etc. etc., it's all the same; once something is done its done. YET, if those things must be done again and in most cases, they will; can't they be done better? I've mistakenly believed that its good to share the why's of my past, when sharing my past. I don't try to hide, duck or dodge the wrong I chose to do. However, I try to paint the circumstance and context in which that decision was made because it really does matter. Callus and premeditated wrong is certainly different from acting out of hurt type wrongs . . . . Does that make any sense?

Regardless of either, the biggest barrier to enjoying peace and building bridges one to another is recognizing that people change. If we constantly decide the future based on the actions of the past or misunderstanding of those actions in their context, who can ever be safe being true? I have often heard people say, "be honest, be up front, be truthful with me so I can decide for myself" . . . . Yeah . . . . Famous last words. It's one thing to hear the truth but handling that truth, how few really can; how fewer ever do!

I wish I could make sense of all that is complex in life, but I can't. All I can do is be as flexible and compassionate as my experiences have made me. However, with this latest burn, I will totally re-evaluate how much I open up and how far I bring someone in to my thoughts. In the end, it really doesn't matter anyway because most people don't know the true sense of what makes us beautiful, which is why most quit on life just as it's about to take flight.

Just to be clear, the fact that we change, (YES, some of us REALLY do) is what makes life beautiful! The butterfly's metamorphosis is just more apparent then ours :-) Those who observe it, have learned what to search for. Isn't it worth the search?

- Re: too much information from n/a, November 12, 2006

There is such thing as to much information, for example Jesus acted as a leader, a manager of sorts, he did not need to supply his staff with the details of the business because it was not a partnership. A parent does not provide a child with all the "truths" of life, because the child needs to find its own way and learn the hard lesons on its own. However, in a partnership, truths must be had to make adult decisions. There is a fine line between truth (even if kept with the intent of protecting somebody) and being deceptive; better error on the side of truth. People can handle truth, being up front, honest and making their own decisions, it just may not be the decision YOU want them to make. If you come to me and tell me you have AIDS, that is a hard truth but it is one that must be said so that I can decide if I want to stick, you may not want to tell me because you are affraid i may go but that is a decision that I, as an adult, have the right to make for myself and not have you make for me. If you don't want to have to tell that truth then perhaps a different decsion should be made, in the first place, to not have to disclose those details. I do agree with you that people change, and i am living proof of that, however, if people use the same "crutches" they did before the "change" did they really change? If a couples relationship failed because of alcohol abuse and upon begining dating again brings the new person to bars isn't it doomed to fail, because the person is doing the same thing that played a part in ending the first one. Especially if the new person had a warning to watch out for the persons drinking. Should the new person not run in the other direction?! I think it's very sad that you would want to, because of some forgetable, judgemental, non empathetic girl that undoubtedly sees life in black and white and is an all or nothing girl, give her the power to shut yourself down and off;and not want to share the most wonderful gift God gave- you.

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