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Every saint has a past and every sinner has a future

July 20, 2006

The depth of this truth is full of comfort. It's the stuff humility and hope are made up of. Facts are hard things; cold things. Sometimes I wonder if this is why "truth" is often resisted. We all have a need for the warmth, that is born out understanding and sympathy. Truth when given, is often without either or perceived as such. Thus itŐs met with resistance. I imagine the way it's given could be a reason BUT so too is how it's perceived. Both are influenced on who we are and how we've come to be.

Life, if NOTHING else, is unpredictable and our life journeys, intersect each others, in all sorts of places at all sorts of times . . . and keeping it real, not all these times and places are good! Sometimes the right thing could occur at the wrong time. However, if Ňthat'sÓ where life happens, shouldn't we attempt to make the best of it?

Generally we don't pick and chose how life unfolds. We do the best we can in the varied spots we find ourselves. The gift of free choice plays a huge part in what we consider "best". I can freely admit that my best, has OFTEN materialized as anything but. Even to this moment, things are causing me great perplexity. I struggle to see how good will be or even can be, worked out of my circumstances. With that said struggle is good because it implies and rightly so, that I am at least trying to hold on and hang in, in spite of my weakness. Its tough. Doing life right. Do you know what I mean? because life is real, I feel it a grave injustice to imply that there is a nice, neat gift wrapped treat awaiting you at the end of each heart ache in your life. Its just NOT that way.

BUT, in our faith >if we can gut it out< we find reason to strive for life, for living. Its easy to shrivel up and die but I don't want to . . . not really, though some days I feel like I have. I thank God for the hope of a future and as he brings me closer, my prayer is that I don't forget my past. I'm a mixed bag of experiences and I'm tired of being reminded of just the darker chapters. I thank God he's merciful to sinners. We want happiness too, sometimes we just go about it in misguided ways.

When lost, when in doubt, when hurt and in confusion, He helps us in faith, to remember that the hope of the future is ours too.

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